Saturday, May 24, 2014

Dissecting Generosity

Ten o'clock at night is not an optimal time for me to start writing. But since I'm only hammering out an update, I thought I would give it a go. There's a good chance I'll end up falling asleep and drowning in a drool puddle before I'm done. Thankfully, the only one here to marvel at that horrific site is the little invalid Corgi mix laying beside me looking like she's picking up Dish TV signals from her largely-coned head. 

She won't mind.

As you might guess, I'm currently house and dog sitting for a couple of days for friends who have left me their Queen size bed, bottles of wine, really excellent guacamole, Apple TV, and their washer and dryer (which might be my favorite part of this whole deal) to use to my heart's content. I had planned on writing a general update from here this weekend to fill people in on the latest fundraising efforts, etc. I'm trying to make a final push so I can take down my GoFundMe page, send off my thank yous, and just use PayPal to host any possible future contributions that might come in. This post was originally intended to talk a bit about that and the various tasks I'm tackling to prepare for the trip ahead.

Instead, I want to write a bit about what happened to me this morning and simply send out more thanks.

This morning, I woke too early to what my friend Shari so perfectly coined as "jerk birds" who were loudly announcing the sun's terrible attempt to rise. I checked in on the furry patient, hid a few pills in some prosciutto for her to secretly snarf and then flirted with my other favorite amenity--the handsome, capable Keurig.  I grabbed my phone to check my messages and right on the heels of my Daily Love email was a notification that someone had made a $1000.00 donation to my PayPal account. 

I really thought this was a mistake. I squinted. I looked again at all those zeros and thought my tired old eyes must have been foolishly adding another zero to the amount. I swiped at my phone screen to enlarge the amount and there they were. Three zeros parading behind the number one. The only thing missing was a marching band.

I've said it before, but as many of you know, that's never stopped my from repeating myself to make a point. I would not be able to participate in the Writer's Mastermind retreat without the help of others. It just couldn't and wouldn't happen. Every single donation has helped to make this possible. From the four crumpled, sweaty one dollar bills from one of Jackson's 6th grade friends, to my incredible cousin who generously donated last month's tuition payment. Every single donation has pushed me forward financially, but each and every one has truly throttled me emotionally. 

Before I fall asleep on my Dell, I want to try and make this point, even if poorly. Every single word of encouragement shared with me still echos in my ears. I have made a gorgeous visual shrine from all the cards you've sent with your generosity tucked inside. I have printed out your emails and all of the comments from my GoFundMe page and I'm bringing them all to Bali with me to share with Mastin and to inspire me to work my ass off. They have become rather necessary.

As I said to my very generous donor this morning, I am aware there are many great people and causes that could have used his incredible donation. I am beyond amazed that he chose me and completely gobsmacked by the words used to deliver his donation.

Especially in light of the fact we've never officially met (which is a story for another day, perhaps.)

I continue to be quite beside myself when I re-read the beautifully-articulated reasoning behind this donation. And all of the others for that matter. I wouldn't dare place a value on the incredible emotional impact these will have when I'm half way around the planet and homesick as hell. I'll be curling up with your words as I'm writing my own.

And I'll be forever thankful.

OK. It's 12:49 and I have to try and sleep a bit before my hour+ morning drive to watch the girlie and her pals kick around the soccer ball. I'm not even going to reread this tonight for editing before posting, so please forgive me grammar gods and punctuation princes.

And hey. Jerk birds. I'll take that 6:00 wake up call.